This just in from Major League Baseball’s classified advertising department:
Seeking baseball executive for president of baseball operations and/or general manager for National League franchise.
Little or no experience acceptable.
Must embrace analytics, algorithms, metrics and all modern methods of playing the game including exit velocity for batters and spin rates for pitchers. Traditionalists need not apply.
Must accept quirky new rules introduced by Ivy League executives now running teams and advising on-field personnel of what to do next.
Compensation modest but will include two free tickets for all home games.
Apply: S. Alderson, Citi Field, Flushing, NY
The New York Mets cleaned house in their executive offices at the end of another depressing season. The plan was to sprinkle a boatload of owner Steve Cohen’s considerable wealth to import a new boss of the baseball side of the baseball team.
Cohen’s first lieutenant, Sandy Alderson, was put in charge of the search, just as he had been a year ago. At that time, Alderson settled on Jared Porter, who lasted about a month before some sordid details about his background surfaced and he was told to seek employment elsewhere. Next up was Zack Scott, hired as Porter’s assistant and promoted when Porter left.
One day in August, Scott was discovered at 4 a.m. asleep at a traffic light and arrested for DUI. He was placed on paid administrative leave, pending legal procedures and then, three months later, invited to follow Porter out the door. What took the Mets three months to dump him? Nobody is saying.
So the team launched its front office search and started big, pursuing Theo Epstein, whose resume includes world championship runs in Boston and Chicago, ending long curses in both venues. “No thank you,’’ he said.
Billy Beane of the Oakland A’s sent his regrets, as well. Milwaukee refused to allow the Mets to interview David Stearns, the team’s president of baseball operations. And by the way, Brewers’ owner Mark Attanasio told the Mets, forget about GM Matt Arnold. He just got an extension to stay in Milwaukee. Michael Girsch, general manager of the Cardinals, was on the list but decided to stay in St. Louis
Brian Sabean, a successful front office boss with the Giants is currently available and was interested but pulled his name back when the Mets indicated they were not interested in him.
And so, the search continues.
Now, with the general manager meetings approaching, the executive suite at Citi Field remains empty and there are no new resumes in the incoming mail.
All of this leads to a familiar moan from Mets fans.